Leave Your Lover
by christmasinacup
Summary: A songfic based on "Leave Your Lover" by Sam Smith. Emma can't bear to see Regina and Robin together any longer and finally decides to do something about it. SQ.
1. Chapter 1

_Author Note: Set in the world they would have now on OUAT if the 'Dark Swan' storyline never happened and Emma and Killian weren't a couple. Enjoy & review! _

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"Have you been getting enough sleep?"

Emma looked up from her coffee, which she had been stirring for two full minutes, and blinked.

"Huh?"

Regina sighed and cocked an eyebrow. She leaned forward.

"I mean this in the nicest way possible - you look like crap."

Emma chuckled and took a sip of coffee. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just being woken up by Neal a lot lately. He's teething."

"Ah." Regina leaned back in the booth and sipped her coffee.

Emma was lying. She lay awake until the early hours of the morning, the night feeling endless and rain pouring outside, wishing for something she knew would never come. Sometimes, she'd climb into the bug and drive past Regina's house. She'd sit in the cold outside in her car, engine off, waiting for Regina to bring her inside. To kiss her, finally. To ease her midnight sorrow and heartbreak. Because she was in love. And Regina would probably never know.

"Emma?"

"Mhmm?" Emma snapped back to focus and saw Regina looking at her expectantly.

"I asked if Henry had told you about his chemistry project. Are you sure you're alright, dear?"

Dear. Emma knew that it wasn't a term of endearment so much as a part of Regina's vocabulary that came from her upbringing. That it didn't make Emma any different than someone Regina had ripped a heart out of. Except that's what she was doing now, without knowing it.

"Yeah, he did. Creative kid," Emma mumbled, taking another gulp of coffee. It burned her tongue, but she barely noticed. Her heart was pounding.

Regina frowned and reached out to touch Emma's wrist. Emma took the final gulp of coffee and jumped up from the table, dropping a crumpled $5 bill next to her empty mug.

"I'm sorry, I forgot that I have somewhere to be," Emma said, making a break for the door. Luckily, the other patrons at Granny's were too engaged in their conversations to really pay attention to what was happening.

Regina got up in a more ladylike fashion and speed-walked out of Granny's. Emma was halfway down the block, but Regina's boots had a low heel and she was determined.

"Emma!"

Emma turned, blonde curls whipping her face. She could speed up and run towards the woods or she could face her problems for once in her life. She didn't have much time to choose.

"Emma," Regina repeated, coming to a jog and stopping in front of her. "What's wrong? You're acting stranger than normal."

"I… I don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry for leaving like that," Emma said. "I just -"

"Just what?," Regina asked. She had a kind look in her eyes. A let-me-help-you-solve-whatever-problem-you-have look. Warm and maternal and loving. It made Emma want to burst into tears.

"I know I don't have much to offer," Emma started quietly. "But I… I love you. And I want you to leave Robin for me. I want to be a family. You, me and Henry."

Regina looked stunned. Her beautiful crimson lips parted and she was speechless. Emma may have been the first person to ever render the queen speechless.

"Emma, I can't just -"

"Pick up and leave everything? You can. He has a child with your sister, who we both know will never let go of him."

Regina knew she was right. Deep down, in her heart of hearts, she knew. But she didn't want to.

"He didn't know - it's not his fault," Regina said, biting back tears. "And we can work past it."

"If it was meant to be, would it be this hard? Regina, we could work. It wouldn't be easy, but it would be way more worth it than this uphill battle you're fighting. I will give you everything, Regina. I will be open and a good co-parent and I will try to be better about doing laundry and I will be anything you need. Just leave him, please. Don't you see what I can bring?"

"Oh, Emma," Regina said softly, reaching for her hand. "I know you could do all those things. But…"

Emma shook her head and took a step back, her hands out of Regina's reach.

"But what? Do you know how it felt when we went and found him in New York? How I was torn apart when you called his name and ran into his arms?"

Regina knew heartbreak. Not that specific type, but she was sure that it had been painful. Like a dagger to the chest.

"Emma - look, it's not like I haven't thought about it, alright?," Regina said. She bit her lip. "I have. But I just can't."

Tears were forming in Emma's eyes.

"You don't have anything to prove. Leaving won't make you out to be weak. You'll be better off. Even if you're without him but not with me. Please, Regina," she pleaded. "Leave him."

Regina stepped forward and took Emma's hand in hers. "Emma, listen to me. You are special - a wonderful mother, strong, brave, fearless - and I admire you so much. And I do love you, but not the same way that I love him. And I need to see this through, for myself. For all he and I have been through."

Emma took a deep breath and tried to collect herself. _The mature, adult thing to do is accept it and wait to fall apart until you're alone,_ she told herself. _Be a grown-up about this._

She nodded slowly. "I understand," she choked out. _Don't cry til you're alone. Don't do it._

Regina's face fell. She knew Emma was lying, trying to make it okay when it clearly wasn't. She pulled her hands from Regina's grasp gently and Regina almost whimpered.

"I have to go," Emma whispered. "Have a nice day, okay? I'll see you…"

She turned and walked away, stuffing her hands in her pockets. Not until she got into the bug did she break down in tears and lay her head against the steering wheel.

XXXXX

Regina got home and immediately went to her bedroom. She tore off her coat, scarf, black silk blouse and jeans and crawled into bed in her underwear, pulling the blankets around herself.

 _She loves you, you idiot. She opened up to you. Emma Swan, the human vault, was vulnerable. And you crushed her heart without even removing it from her chest. You're awful._

Her phone buzzed and she reluctantly got out of bed and fished it out from her purse. Crawling back into bed, she typed in her passcode and saw a text from Robin.

 **Robin: Hey love! Lunch at 1? We can have a picnic at the troll bridge.**

 **Regina: I'm not feeling well, actually. I was about to take a nap.**

 **Robin: Oh, dear. Can I bring you some soup?**

 **Regina: Thank you, but I'm not hungry. I'll let you know if I feel better after I nap.**

 **Robin: Alright. I love you!**

 **Regina. Love you too.**

Regina placed her phone on the nightstand and burrowed deeper into her blankets, trying to escape into the sweet release of sleep.

XXXXX

Emma sat in the bug on the troll bridge, playing Fruit Ninja on her phone. An inane task to partake in on a dark bridge at 11:27 p.m. and something she could be doing at home, but she needed to think away from her parents cooing over her baby brother. She loved them, but it was getting to be a headache to share such a small space. She couldn't just drink her pain away and watch a horror move like she usually did when she was upset. Of course, she did have booze in the backseat. But unless she wanted to sleep in her car on the bridge, she needed to stay sober tonight.

Someone knocked on her window and she dropped her phone. She picked it back up and switched on the flashlight.

"Regina?"

Regina opened the car door and squinted. Emma quickly turned her flashlight app off.

"Um, hi," she said as Regina made herself comfortable in the passenger seat. "What are you-?"

The blue silk peaking out from under Regina's coat alerted Emma to the fact that Regina was wearing her pajamas.

"Emma," Regina said shakily. "You were right. I've been tossing and turning for hours and going over what you said."

Emma just stared at her. Regina had gotten out of bed and driven across town for her?

"How did you know where to find me?"

"There's only so many places in this town to brood late at night when you live in a cramped loft with a newborn and his hapless parents," Regina said with a bit of her trademark sass. Emma wanted to laugh, but she was still too shocked.

"Zelena will never let go of Robin," Regina continued. "And I've known it for some time now. You're right."

Emma sighed. "I'm sorry. I was too harsh earlier. It wasn't fair."

"It was," Regina said firmly. "We can't work past it and I shouldn't waste my time when there is someone who can give me what I need, who I can trust."

Emma blinked a few times. Regina's words hung in the air but neither one was doing a thing. Finally, Regina leaned in and kissed Emma on the lips gently. Emma kissed back, but barely, still processing what was happening.

"Emma, I'm so sorry," Regina whispered, pulling back. "When you walked away earlier, and your hands slipped away from mine, I felt… I was devastated. I felt like I was losing you forever. Like I had ruined you and broken your heart and lost my chance." A tear rolled down her cheek.

Emma reached out and wiped the tear away, a tiny smile making its face onto her face. "Really?"

Regina nodded. "Yes."

Emma's face broke into a grin. One of those oh-my-god-I-can't-even-believe-it grins. Regina smiled and laughed with relief. She leaned in to kiss Emma again, this time deeper. Emma murmured happily and fell into her.

"I meant what I said about not loving you and Robin the same way," Regina whispered in Emma's ear as Emma kissed her neck. "You feel like home. I love you like you've always been beside me, like family."

Emma cupped Regina's face. "Do you really mean that?"

Regina nodded. "I do. I'm going to leave him, Emma. I'm done."

Emma smiled and pressed a small kiss to Regina's lips.

"We can be good together, I promise. I meant every word I said," she said with a smile. Regina matched her smile with an even brighter one.

"No, we can be great," she whispered, stroking Emma's hair. "Thank you for showing me that."

Emma couldn't do anything but smile. She let go of Regina and tucked he hair behind her ears.

"So what now?"

"Now, we go home," Regina said. "Because it's frigid in this car and I have a lot of warm blankets and spiked cider and a big fireplace."

"I like that," Emma said. "Meet you at your place? I'm assuming your car is around here somewhere."

"Actually, I used magic to get here. I couldn't wait the time it would take to drive," Regina blushed.

"Oh, is that so?," Emma asked. She winked. "Well, buckle your seatbelt. Don't tell the mayor or the sheriff, but I'm gonna break the speed limit a little bit."

Regina laughed. "Secret's safe with me."

Emma started her car and took off down the road back to town. For the first time, she didn't feel alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Back at Regina's, the two women sat in front of the fireplace with mugs of spiked cider. Regina had changed from her pajamas to jeans and a black v-neck sweater. A blanket was draped over her and Emma's legs and feet, but there was still some space between them.

"So I cleared my throat and said,'Excuuuuuuse me, I wasn't finished talking,'" Emma laughed. Regina's eyes widened.

"Really?"

Emma nodded. "Yep. And then after I finished talking, I stomped on his foot," she said with a grin. "None of the other boys at that group home ever interrupted me again."

Regina laughed. "What a precocious 9-year-old."

Emma sighed. "I was a spunky kid. I didn't fully grow into my angsty feelings of abandonment until my teens."

Regina took one of Emma's hands in hers and squeezed it. Emma gently caressed Regina's hand with her thumb and smiled shyly.

"Do you have any fun stories from your childhood?," Emma asked. "When your mom wasn't around or… or something?"

"You know, I don't really remember," Regina said. "I know I rode horses quite often, sometimes with my father. But other than that, it's very cloudy. I think the pain and bad memories have taken up too much space."

"Been there," Emma said quietly. She slowly inched closer to Regina.

"May I…"

Regina nodded, thinking Emma was asking to kiss her. Which was adorable. But instead, Emma laid her head on Regina's shoulder and cuddled up against her. A warm feeling arose in Regina's chest and she smiled. After a few moments, she laid a kiss on Emma's head and began to stroke her long blonde hair.

"Emma?"

"Yeah?"

"What compelled you to tell me yesterday?"

Emma sat up and looked Regina in the eyes. "Dear."

Regina furrowed her brow and Emma continued.

"You called me 'dear.' I know for you it's part of your vocabulary and not always intended as a term of endearment, but I've only known that term to be what you call someone you love. And for a second, I could see myself calling you a sweet nickname. Would I call you 'babe' or 'honey'? Or maybe Gina, which is less romantic but maybe I would be the only one allowed to call you that."

Words spilled out of Emma's mouth like bees from a hive.

"And then I told myself to focus, because you call a lot of people 'dear.' Including those you ripped hearts out of. No offense. I realized that you were ripping my heart out without knowing and I knew I was screwed and I couldn't breathe and I needed to get some air so I ran for it, forgetting how transparent a person can be when it comes to the one they love. I thought I was playing it cool, but then you chased after me and I knew telling the truth was all I could do."

Regina's eyes were wide and her beautiful blood red lips were gaping open. Emma took a deep breath, realizing how long she had gone without stopping for air. Seconds went by in silence.

 _You shouldn't have mentioned ripping out hearts,_ Emma told herself. _That was a dumb thing to sa-_

She was cut off mid-thought by Regina's lips latching onto hers. And Regina's arms around her neck. And a warmth in her belly that was slowly sinking below her belly button.

Emma kissed back and tangled her fingers in Regina's silky hair. She gently guided Regina down to the floor and began to kiss her neck when Regina hooked her ankles around Emma's and flipped her over.

"Let the queen conquer," Regina whispered in Emma's ear, making her shiver in the most beautiful way.

Emma was going to reply with something witty or sexy, but she couldn't speak. After a few minutes, she sat up. Not that she wasn't enjoying Regina slow unbuttoning her of flannel…

Regina sat up too and looked confused. "What? Did I do something wrong?"

"No," Emma said, shaking her head vigorously. "I just -"

Regina smirked. "Want to take it slow? Emma, we're grown women. Experienced, sexy and consenting women. We don't need to go base-by-base, getting to know each slowly and then uncovering each other's bodies. I can go down on you right here on this carpet and we can have mind-blowing sex and still fall in love. This isn't a hook up. This is a change for the better. This won't be a dirty little secret come morning. This will be real. It's been real since the moment you ran out of Granny's."

It was now Emma's turn to gape in awe. And then laugh.

"Regina, I have pee."

"What?"

"I drank a lot of cider to stop myself from ripping your clothes off first. So I really have to pee."

Regina burst out laughing. Add in her sexy mussed-up hair, and she looked a bit manicial.

"Oh my goodness, go. Emma, go! Down the hall and on the left."

Emma jumped up, kissing the top of Regina's head and racing down the hall.

Regina leaned back against the couch and ran her fingers through her hair, trying to smooth it. She was trying to process what had just happened. Emma had been adorably flustered, immediately becoming vulnerable for Regina the second she asked.

"Hey," Emma said, placing her hand on Regina's shoulder. "You okay? You're sort of staring into space."

Regina smiled and took Emma's hand, pulling her down into her lap.

"I want you to call me 'babe.'"

"What?"

"Babe. It's sexy and unique to this realm and it makes me feel really hot just thinking about it. So, I want your term of endearment for me to be 'babe.' And you can choose yours. I was thinking Em. I don't want to go back to calling you Swan because we're different people now. Last names are impersonal when you have intimate knowledge of someone. And I'm about to have very intimate knowledge of you, Emma."

Emma was laughing, which turned into happy tears and a big grin and she kissed Regina as hard as she could.

"You got it, babe," she whispered between kisses. "And you may call me 'Em.' I love it and I love you and I want you to know me. Every corner, every inch."

"I want you to know me too," Regina whispered happily. "But right now, I just want to kiss you and finish what I started earlier."

"Go for it," Emma whispered. " _Babe_."

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I hope y'all like where I took this! Do you want to see more?


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